Take the Long Way Home

Someone I know on Facebook posted one of the saddest statements I've ever heard.

“i'm just worthless. no point in caring for me.”

This statement just broke my heart.  As I've mentioned before, I have struggled with depression for much of my life.  In February 2004, I wrote a list of negative words that I associate with myself.  I found myself surprised at the horrible things I said about myself.  Then, I felt like God impressed upon me to write the words that He uses to describe me.  Words like Worthy, Intelligent, Creative, Unique and many others sprang to mind.

I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Your works are wonderful, I know that full well.
Psalm 139:14

This verse sums up how God feels about us.  We were each created with a particular set of skills and attributes that God has assembled by His design and for His purpose.

For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.
Ephesians 2:10

You are a human being with intrinsic value no matter what you've done or haven't done. Why? Because God made you that way.  Your value isn't defined by what you have done, but by what He did!  “You are not your own; you were bought at a price.”  Please try to keep in mind the price that was paid to bring you into a right relationship with God, especially as we celebrate the resurrection of Jesus this Sunday.

In His love

Weekend Fiction - Keeper / Longing Poetry

For this edition of Weekend Fiction, I've done something rather strange.  On the left is a poem I wrote to my wife not long after the birth of our son.  On the right is the same poem with the words scrambled.  I find it interesting that even with the words in random order, much of the sentiment remains.
Keeper Keeper of my heart Mother of my son How can I even start To say that you're my love Friend, Lover Helped me discover The life that I was longing for Ten years have passed Still you stir my soul Without you I wouldn't be whole Wife, Mother I could not love another Always, you'll be in my heart	Longing Keeper always Keeper discover To that in you not I passed You'll still my love be whole How could my I love without you Start be of I Friend, I wouldn't That for years even helped Lover of life The heart was Mother Heart me can another You're soul my stir Say my Wife, Mother have my son ten
By the way, for the two of you that were interested, last week's edition of Weekend Fiction, “The Visitor” was loosely based on the Star Trek episode Requiem for Methuselah.

Let My Love Open the Door

I heard an interesting illustration this week; God was compared to a parent whose child had been tortured and killed.  Rather than seeking vengeance, he chooses to offer forgiveness.  I intended to write a this illustration as if it happened to me and my son, but I didn't.  No matter how powerful an illustration it would be, I can't bring myself to write about my son being brutalized.  As I was hearing this illustration, I had a mental image of my young son being nailed to a cross by evil hands.  This image was almost more than I could bear; and I found myself moved to tears by it.  If it were in my power, I would never allow anything to hurt my son.  I would freely give my last breath and every ounce of the limited strength I possess to protect him.

In Genesis 22, the Lord tested Abraham to see if he would trust God and obey, even to the point of sacrificing his own son.  God of course had no intention of allowing the sacrifice to take place, but was rather using this test to demonstrate to future generations the incredible faith of Abraham.  I sincerely hope that God never chooses to test me in any way similar to this; I can quite confidently say now that I would not pass, and I'm nearly certain that any parent reading this agrees with me.

By faith Abraham, when God tested him, offered Isaac as a sacrifice. He who had embraced the promises was about to sacrifice his one and only son, even though God had said to him, “It is through Isaac that your offspring will be reckoned.” Abraham reasoned that God could even raise the dead, and so in a manner of speaking he did receive Isaac back from death.
Hebrews 11:17-19

Many Christians, myself included like to talk about giving everything that they have to God.  I wonder if any of us would go to this extreme if God asked us to?  Wouldn't it be incredible to have such a close relationship with God that He could literally speak to you and there would be no shadow of doubt that you were hearing His voice?  Abraham was a man; he was not a God.  If Abraham could have this type of relationship with God, it stands to reason that we could also.  For myself, while I find it easy to make this statement I have tremendous difficulty believing anyone who claims that God has spoken to them.

Why is it that I am so quick to dismiss the idea of God speaking?  I honestly cannot say.  What I can say is this: the incredible beauty, complexity and vastness of the universe makes me skeptical of the idea that it could have come into being through random chance.  The more I learn, the more I am convinced that some sort of incredibly powerful being whose existence is not tied to our universe had a hand in designing it.

For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse.
Romans 1:20

The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands.
Psalm 19:1

If there truly is a creator of the universe, it stands to reason that developing a relationship with this being would be a tremendous asset to anyone.  This is where religion comes in; religion is defined as “the service and worship of God or the supernatural”.  There is a problem here however.  We as created beings are strictly confined to our universe, we cannot escape.  There is nothing we can do or not do to change this fact.  In nearly every major religion on earth, the general idea is that we as humans must perform certain tasks and/or rituals to reach God.  The problem is, God by necessity must exist outside of the universe.  We cannot get there.  If we are to have a relationship with God, He must make the first move.

Humans do not like the idea of being controlled.  We like to believe that we are in control of our destinies.  So here we are, trapped in our particular form of existence while all around us we see incredible complexity and deep inside realize that there must've been a designer.  (You might say that not everyone does realize this, but I would suggest that if we did not believe this way, society could not exist; nearly every human would rather choose to indulge in whatever pleasures are available during our time in this life.)  We realize there is a designer, and because this designer is so much more powerful than we are, we become angry and rebel against this authority.  So long as we are in a state of rebellion against God, we cannot have a relationship.

This is why God chose to send an emissary.  God chose to come to earth in human form.  Our acts of rebellion however must still be dealt with.  No matter who else it may hurt, every single immoral thing that we do is an act of rebellion against God therefore, God is the only one who has absolute authority to forgive us.  He, in his human form, Jesus chose to accept the penalty for our sin.

But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
Romans 5:8

He loves us.  For reasons that are beyond our comprehension, the creator of the universe chose to also create beings, with the decision-making capacity to either choose to have a relationship with Him or not.  The next move is ours.  Will you choose to take advantage of your opportunity to know the creator of the universe or will you choose to continue on the path of rebellion?

But if serving the LORD seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your ancestors served beyond the Euphrates, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the LORD.
Joshua 24:15

Which path will you choose?

Weekend Fiction - The Visitor

I haven't posted this week; I was busy with another writing job.  I wrote this story in 2007, based on my fascination with Cain, and an episode of Star Trek.  The first person who can tell me which episode wins a prize!  Enjoy.

"Hello there; it's so nice to see you!"

The door slid open noiselessly on a set of hidden tracks.  The old man gestured expansively, welcoming his guest.

"I've been hoping that you would visit for quite a while now.  I've hardly had any company at all since... I can't even remember."

The old man was moving quickly now, clearing the table, turning on lights, busying himself in the tiny kitchen.

"Now, have a seat.  Would you like something to drink; anything to eat?"

The visitor declined a snack, and rather than sitting, simply elected to stay in place near the door.  The old man ignored his visitor's impropriety and took a seat himself.

"So, tell me; what have you been doing since the Others left?  Have you been taking care of yourself?  To tell you the truth I've been beginning to think there was no one else left."

The visitor started to move into the room, but froze after a single step.  The old man moved quickly to his guest, flipping open a hidden panel.  He looked pensively at a display inside as he tapped on a keypad he held in his hand.

"Damn!  General system fault again."

Cain, the Immortal pressed the shutdown key on his latest android companion.  His eyes began to glisten with tears.

"Goodbye, my friend."

Land of Confusion

I don't understand prayer.  In the Bible, there is such an emphasis on God doing specific things that people have asked Him for in prayer.  Hannah became pregnant with Samuel.  When Elijah prayed, fire came down from heaven and consumed the sacrifice and the altar it was placed on.  An iron axe head floated to the surface of a river.  Samson was granted strength to destroy the Philistine temple.  All of these things and many many more, God did in response to the prayers of His people.  There are very few biblical examples of a person praying and God not acting in the manner that was asked of Him.

Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me.  But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.
2 Corinthians 12:8-9

So, what was the problem?  It certainly wasn't a lack of faith; once when Paul prayed, a person was raised from the dead.

Going a little farther, he fell to the ground and prayed that if possible the hour might pass from him.  “Abba, Father,” he said, “everything is possible for you. Take this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.”
Mark 14:35-36

Here is an even more extreme example; Jesus himself prayed that he would not have to face the cross and did not have his prayer granted.

Where does this leave us?  If God cannot be counted on to grant us the things we ask for, why do we serve Him?

Jesus turned and said to Peter, “Get behind me, Satan! You are a stumbling block to me; you do not have in mind the concerns of God, but merely human concerns.”
Matthew 16:23

Unfortunately, much of what we pray for falls under the category of “human concerns”.  When God chooses where does not choose to grant a request, we can be certain that His action serves His greater design.  This world is a temporary home.

LORD, what are human beings that you care for them, mere mortals that you think of them?  They are like a breath; their days are like a fleeting shadow.
Psalm 144:3-4

This life, this world is nothing but a time of preparation for the existence we are meant to have.  This life does indeed have its beautiful moments, but every wonderful thing we see is but a shadow of the beauty we will see when we see Him face to face and all the worries and cares and questions that we have will melt away.  Lord, please let me always be faithful to Your purpose for me.

Weekend Fiction - Threshold

Our research ship, the Threshold, hovered about 800,000 kilometers from the event horizon.  We could've taken better readings by moving closer, but then even the most powerful engines ever designed wouldn't have been able to hold us back from the incredible pull of gravity generated by our test subject.

Though our shielding was sufficient to protect us from the intense X-ray radiation, there was something unnerving about looking at the black hole with the naked eye.  Some compared it to staring down the barrel of a weapon.  I felt more like a projectile; about to be forced through the barrel at inconceivable speed.

We were on the final leg of our mission, examining the black hole known as subject K14-683.  For the last three days, it has been business as usual for us; taking readings and performing tests.

"Sir!" Lieutenant Caruthers shouted; "Positive contact in optical."

"What've we got?" I asked.

"It looks like a vessel of some kind, holding station about 12 kilometers from the event horizon; spherical, 6 meters in diameter."

"Analysis?"

The Lieutenant scowled as he examined the various displays arrayed at his station.

"Unknown, it seems to have no source of propulsion.  I've never seen anything like it."

I ordered a routine scan of the object, probing the object in a wide range of spectra and frequencies.

Ensign Michaels began shouting, bypassing the usual chain of command.  "The unknown is moving.  It's on a collision course!"

Lieutenant Caruthers hit the collision alarm.  "Time to intercept; 25 seconds."

The expected impact never came; the unknown vessel stopped 10 meters off of our bow.  Then our engines went dead.

"Main engine shutdown!  We're being pulled in."  The Lieutenant paused a moment, then continued; “40 seconds to event horizon."

There was nothing left to do, every member of the crew knew there was no hope; the bridge was silent as we each prepared to meet death.  The unknown kept its position off our bow, exactly matching our acceleration.  We reached the event horizon, but instead of being destroyed; we suddenly found ourselves in normal space once again.

The silence was finally broken by Lieutenant Caruthers; "Ensign Michaels; report."

"The unknown is still off the bow; engines operating at station keeping."

"What's our position?” I asked.

Lieutenant Caruthers consulted his stellar maps.  Finally; he responded; "Position... uncharted."

Don't Bring Me Down

When He walked the Earth, Jesus was always accepting of sinners; but he was never apologetic about calling sin sin.  Listen to what Jesus says.


“Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You are like whitewashed tombs, which look beautiful on the outside but on the inside are full of the bones of the dead and everything unclean.  In the same way, on the outside you appear to people as righteous but on the inside you are full of hypocrisy and wickedness.”
Matthew 23:27-28


As for those who would say that pointing out hypocrisy is being judgmental, look at what Paul says in first Corinthians.


Or do you not know that the Lord’s people will judge the world? And if you are to judge the world, are you not competent to judge trivial cases?  Do you not know that we will judge angels? How much more the things of this life!
1 Corinthians 6:2-4


There is absolutely nothing wrong with asking people who call themselves Christians to behave in a way that reflects Christ.  Not in an angry manner that drives people away from Christ, but in a loving manner.


Preach the word; be prepared in season and out of season; correct, rebuke and encourage—with great patience and careful instruction.
2 Timothy 4:2


My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.
James 1:19-20


The number one priority is to see others as Christ sees them.  This can only happen through faithful study, prayer and worship.  Be certain that if you call someone on their sin that you are not guilty yourself.


How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye?
Matthew 7:4


To serve God, we should act as He did on earth, speaking the truth while remaining loving at all times.